Some clinicians question whether “process addictions,” such as sex addictions, qualify instead as compulsions. The person struggling with sex addiction, for example, needs to find the appropriate motivation to change their compulsive behavior. The individual eventually acknowledges the extreme consequences of their actions. At this point the person wants to change. Individual therapy helps one successfully master these life changes.
Roman Gelperin in his 2017 book, “Addiction Procrastination and Laziness,” states the desire to engage in an inappropriate behavior outweighs the behavior’s negative outcome. The positive outcome of resisting the behavior does not provide enough incentive to stop. Resisting the behavior often leads to mounting sadness, anxiety or anger causing extreme discomfort. The distressed person may choose a new behavior or resort to their “tried and true” maladaptive behavior. Damn the consequences at least for one more time!
Gelperin links the “fundamental human compulsion to an increase in pleasure and decrease in displeasure.” In my opinion this seems a bit simplistic. Soothing a severe negative emotion requires more than increasing pleasure. Perhaps people prone to compulsive behaviors exhibit an inability to tolerate bad feelings for any length of time.
According to the author, appealing to a person’s logical self helps unlock their ability to change behavior. Guilt and remorse often becomes a strong motivating force for change. However, the intensity of the guilt must be large enough to stop the individual from engaging in the negative behavior. Compulsive sexual actions are particularly vulnerable to this process as the pleasure may outweigh the guilt.
What must a person do to change their compulsive behavior? The author outlines various approaches. Each approach provides the individual opportunity for change. A patient must actively engage the following actions to make lasting changes. Each action involves a conscious choice by the individual.
Form new habits by replacing the inappropriate action with a healthier behavior. The new behavior provides a similar outcome with positive consequences. For example, if you suffer from anxiety, engage in physical activity rather than viewing pornography.
Control your environment by making changes. If your compulsive behavior begins with hanging out with coworkers after work, then go directly home or straight to the gym. Look for proactive ways to make sure you avoid those surroundings which increase the likelihood of engaging in your temptations.
Employ social motivation to improve the likelihood of change. Individual therapy can assist by holding you accountable to another person. Maintaining an open and honest demeanor helps you examine what triggers and motivates your inappropriate actions.
Using guided imagery in individual therapy helps practice new behaviors. The power of imagination can help you visualize engaging in more appropriate behaviors while resisting negative ones. It also gives you the opportunity to deal with any powerful emotions which arise during the exercise while in the safety of an individual session.
Struggling with compulsive/addictive behaviors greatly interferes with achieving your potential. If you suffer with addictive behaviors please don’t hesitate to call for help. Individual therapy helps begin the process of change. Call or email Dr. Goschi today at (312)595-1787 or barbara@drgoschi.com.