The authors Ogas and Gaddam of the 2011 book, “A Billion Wicked Thoughts,” outline some alarming facts. This book highlights not only the explosion of pornography sites but an alarming rise in pornography addiction. The sharp increase in sexual addiction/pornography addiction interferes with healthy sexual functioning. According to the authors, only 90 porn magazines were available for purchase in 1991. By 1997 the web introduced some 900 porn sites. Today, the number of porn sites has exploded to over 2.5 million. This disturbing trend has profound implications for children, adults of every age, relationships, and marriages.
Couples of all ages often seek therapy due to a sexless relationship/marriage. It’s alarming to have a couple in their 30’s complain they haven’t had sex in 2 years. When the therapist digs a little deeper they find out that one of the partners obsessively uses pornography while masturbating each time (even several times a day). The partner simply doesn’t understand, instead, he or she perceives the excessive porn usage as infidelity.
Women are not exempt from engaging in on line pornography. They may be sexually acting out on line by hooking up with someone they meet on a virtual site. However, it seems more common for women to be “addicted” to the online sex chat rooms or the gaming sights including sexually explicit avatars. These women seek romance or to express an alternate self.
Overall, men and women have become susceptible to the seductive nature of online pornography. The implications for their lives is profound. Young men spend hours surfing the web for the perfect sexual fantasy isolating themselves from friends and family. Some men lose their jobs as they cannot stop themselves from engaging in pornographic searches at the office. Women run off with men that they’ve met online only to be disappointed and disenfranchised from their families afterward. They sometimes find themselves in dangerous situations from which they find it impossible to escape. Their family and friends disown them making it impossible to “get their old life back.” We tend to judge women more harshly than their male counterparts.
Individual or couples therapy as well as a 12 step support group is very helpful in pulling these individuals out of their addictive behavior. If you or a loved one struggles with pornography addiction call for help today. You can reach Dr. Goschi at (312) 595-1787 or barbara@drgoschi.com